saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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