Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize