Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Randomize