Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
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