direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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