That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
