I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize