Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Randomize
