I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize