If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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