you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
