Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
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