Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Randomize