We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
25 Disturbing Facts That Will Make You Question Everything
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
31 People Admit To Nasty Things They Do On The Reg
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.