Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Randomize
