Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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