Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
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