just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
