garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
