This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Randomize
