Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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