I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
You are a genius and a whore.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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