it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
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