Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
