I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
Randomize