don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Randomize