Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
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