U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
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