I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize