Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
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