U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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