Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
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