Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
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