Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Randomize
