Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
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