did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
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