Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Randomize
