this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize