Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Randomize
