Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
