You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
