feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Randomize
