The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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