i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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