69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
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