Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
