I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
