Pappa wants mamma naked
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?