What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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