Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
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