I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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